July 6, 2016

Overcoming the Distance: LDR Tips

I met my husband online. He's from Ohio and I lived 6 hours away in Indiana. We were 17 years old, crazy in love, but unfortunately we also had to deal with the hundreds of miles that separated us. Long distance sucks. It really really sucks, but there are a few things you can do to make it suck less.

Make Skype your New BFF
When Caleb and I were long distance we skyped ALL the time! Just ask our families, and they'll tell you how there never seemed to be a moment we weren't talking. Skype helps shorten the distance between y'all, even by just a little bit. It's never going to be as good as in person, but it definitely helps.

Remember That it's Not Forever
I know at times it can feel like you've been separated forever and it's going to be forever until you see them again too. Those times are extremely tough, but it's important to remember it's NOT forever. Eventually you will see each other again and then one day you'll get back together and not have to leave. Focus on that and the time won't seem as daunting.

Communicate with One Another
Communication is key in any relationship, but it is especially vital for those in a LDR. You won't always get the same clues into each other's feelings like you would in person. So talk to one another, express your thoughts and feelings, and make sure you're listening to what your partner has to say. It's important to be on the same page with where your life is going. Also, it's just nice to know the little things about each other's day. When you're LDR talking makes up like 80% of what y'all do together so make sure it's effective and positive.

Plan Visits Together
I tried to visit Caleb in Ohio every month. Some times it was less, sometimes it was more and when we did get to visit it was usually only for a quick weekend. Although it was short those weekends were the best weekends of my life! Knowing we would be together in a short amount of time made the times we were apart easier to handle.  Plus it gave us something to talk about and plan for in between each trip.

Make the Most of When You're Together
When you get to be with each other again, make the most of it! The first day or so will most likely be spent just chilling, catching up, and enjoying each other's company. That's totally okay, but make sure you try to do at least one exciting thing when you're together. Whether that's visiting a restaurant you've always wanted to eat at, visiting the zoo, or even a mini-road trip if time allows!

Keep Busy
There will be moments when the distance will hit you...hard. The first few days after you're separated again are usually the hardest and it's okay to spend that day in bed and cry. You can't stay there forever though. It's tough, I know, but it's important to keep going. Keep yourself busy whether that be with school, work, or just a hobby. Plus, it makes the time apart go by faster!

Things to Do Together:
One problem Caleb and I always had was running out of things to do. Sure it was nice to talk to one another, but there will be moments when you just want to go somewhere, play a board game, or just be next to one another. One thing that helped keep us from getting board was playing lots of video games. We'd spend hours playing Minecraft together through Xbox Live, watch netflix together(just click play at the same time!), and played multi player games on our phone. These are the things we still do today even when we're together!

I hope y'all found these tips helpful. If you have any of your own tips be sure to leave them in the comments down below. I'm so happy we don't have to deal with this like we use to, but in the long run it did strengthen our relationship.
 Best wishes and lots of love!


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